Facebookville General Hospital Directory

Facebookville General Hospital has a number of well established Departments, some seriously important staff members and patients. The Life in the Fast Lane team have combined with the Utopian College of Emergency for Medicine to help coagulate disparate colleagues in a unifying hospital structure.

The Surgical Matron	Advanced Nurse Practitioner	The Agency Nurse	The Physician Assistant
The Recovery Nurse	The Theatre Nurse	The Pain Nurse	The Student Nurse
The Research Nurse	The Speciality Nurse Practitioner	Nurse Tutor	Newly Qualified Staff Nurse
The District Nurse	The Medical Matron	The Student Nurse

The Resuscitation Officer	The A&E Consultant	The A&E Registrar	Emergency Medicine Consultant
The A&E SHO	Accident & Emergency Nurse	The A + E Waiting Room	A&E Assistant Practitioner
The A&E Sister	The A&E Senior Staff Nurse	The A&E Resus Nurse	A&E wristband monitor
Emergency Department Sister	Emergency Department Nurse	The Triage Nurse
Emergency Department Patient Journey and Flow Champion	The Inappropriately Grumpy A&E Receptionist	The Emergency Department Charge Nurse/ ENP

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The Consultant Surgeon	The Surgical Registrar	The Surgical SHO	The Orthopaedic SHO
Consultant Transplant Surgeon	Consultant Vascular Surgeon	Cardiothoracic Surgeon	The Urology Registrar
The Plastic Surgeon	The Trauma Surgeon	The Neurosurgeon	The Orthopaedic Registrar
The Neurosurgical Registrar	The Cardiothoracic Registrar

The Medical Registrar	The General Practitioner	The Medical Consultant	Consultant Cardiac Physiologist
The Gastro Registrar	The Cardiology Registrar	The Neurologist	The Oncology SHO
The Ophthalmologist	The Dermatology Registrar	The Psychiatry SHO	The Palliative Medicine Registrar
The Consultant Oncologist

Curmudgeonly Anaesthetic Consultant	The Operating Department Practioner	The Student Operating Department Practioner	The Theatre Manager
Backstabber	The Anaesthetic Registrar	Student ODP	The Theatres Manager
The ODP	The Principal ODP	The Ditsy Blonde Student ODP	Pump Monkey
The Anaesthetic Nurse

The Critical Care consultant	The ITU Charge Nurse	The ITU Nurse	The Critical Care Outreach Team
The Critical Care Sister	The ICU Registrar	The Critical Care SHO	The Anaesthetics & ICU registrar
The Intensive Care Nurse	The Critical Care Auxiliary Nurse

The Midwife	The Gynaecology Registrar	The Obstetric Registrar	The Labour Ward
The Head of Midwifery	The Midwifery Matron	The Student Midwife	The O&G SHO
Community Midwife	The Labour Ward Co-Ordinator	The midwifery lecturer	The Labour Ward Teapot
The independent midwife	The Newly Qualified Midwife	The Breastfeeding Coordinator	The Birth Centre
The Holistic Madwife	The Maternity Support Worker	Labour ward Maternity assistant	The Birth Doula
The Maternity Ward	Obstetrics and Gynaecology Consultant	Obstetrics and Gynaecology Registrar	The Stand-alone birthing centre midwife

	The Neonates Registrar	The Paediatrics SHO	The Paediatric SHO	Paediatric ED Nurse
	The Paediatrics Registrar

	The Maxfax Registrar	The Maxillofacial Registrar	The Trainee Dental Nurse	The Consultant Restorative Dentist
	The (Mental) Dental Institute	The Professor of Periodontology	The Consultant Oral & Maxillofacial Surgeon

	The Microbiology Registrar	The Infectious Diseases Registrar	The Pathology Registrar	The Superbug
	The Infection Control Nurse Practitioner	The Chemical Pathology Registrar

The Medical Student	The F1 On Call	The Locum Doctor	The Australian Doctor
The International Medical Student	The Final Year Medical Student	The Medical Student	Locum FY2
Third Year Medical Student	The Dental Student	Painfully Enthusiastic Medical Student

The Ward Manager	The Medical Secretary	The Very Stressed Bleep Holder	The Union Representative
The Cardiac Technician	The Hospital Manager	The Human Resources Manager	The Hospital Radio DJ
The Bed Manager	The Hospital Priest	The Medical Photographer	Hospital Lab Biomedical Scientist
The Finance Manager	The Finance Analyst	The Health Care Assistant	The Hospital Porter
The Hospital Ghost	The Reaper	The Polish Cleaner	The Therapy Animal
The Security Guard	The Hospital Security Guard	Medical Records Manager	The Pervy Porter
The Physiotherapist	The Hospital Pharmacist	The British National Formulary	Speech and Language Therapist
The Occupational Therapist	Occupational Therapy Student

	The Doctor’s Mess	The Linen Cupboard	Switchboard	Fracture Clinic
	The Facebookville Hospital Shop	The IT Department

	The Tangle Fairies	The Hospital Trolley	The Off Duty Rota	The Surgical Glove
	Incident form	Pat Slide	The Hospital Podding System

	The Patient	The Private Patient	The Frequent Attender	The Intense Relatives
	The Hemicorporectomy patient	The Malingerer	Borderline Personality Disorder patient

	The Facebookville NHS Trust	Facebookville General Hospital	The SUPA Independent Hospital	The Chief Executive
	The NHS Non Executive Director	The Strategic Health Authority